ONLINE DATING WITH SMART GIRLS

How to overcome my fear of approaching woman

I've never had a boyfriend and I'm 25 years old; I'm comfortable and confident in "being alone" and frankly, I'd rather be "alone" than with the wrong person or someone who is emotionally abusive, like with the person you're with... Man, the only way out is through. If you want to overcome a fear of approaching women, you have to look at it like honing a skill or talent; practice makes perfect, and practice alleviates fears and insecurities in that practice. In other words... approach women. Make casual conversation; be friendly and listen to what they have to say and engage; engaging with people helps to overcome your fear of shyness or awkwardness because you're focusing on them rather than yourself. Also, don't put up with bullshit from people who are treating you badly. To me that spells out a lack of confidence; don't settle for something that's less than what you think you deserve. And if that is what you think you deserve, then maybe you should re-evaluate why you want a relationship and what you hope to get out of dating someone. MORE

30% female have sex on their first date

Thirty percent of women who use online dating services have had sex on a first date, according to a study by Sexuality Research & Social Policy, a journal of the National Sexuality Research Center. The research was conducted by Paige M. Padgett, Ph.D., and published in the June 2007 issue of the journal. The name of the study is Personal Safety and Sexual Safety for Women Using Online Personal Ads. While the 30% of women having sex on the first date may surprise people, even more shocking is that out of that number, 77% of them didn't use any protection during the sexual encounters. Some online dating services make it easy for people to meet up for sexual encounters by offering "Intimate" or "Erotic" services to members. "Risky behaviour like this, from both males and females, is contributing to the dramatic rise of sexually trasmitted diseases," says Joe Tracy, Publisher of Online Dating Magazine. Online Dating Magazine, a consumer watchdog publication for online daters, also contains an STD Info Center with educational information about sexually transmitted diseases. "When you have unprotected sex with people you are meeting online, you are playing russian roullette with your health. It's not a matter of 'if' you'll get a sexually transmitted disease, but rather 'when' and 'how many'." Safety measures some women use before meeting a man, according to the study, are: 1) Googling him. 2) Running a background check. 3) Not giving any personal information (like address, phone number, etc.). 4) Revisit subjects already discussed to see if the man is lying. 5) Gut instinct. The study shows a strong popularity of online daters using email to communicate with each other. Some women set sex boundaries via email, others made it clear there would be no sex on the first date, and others didn't discuss the subject at all. The study showed that neary 3/4ths of those who had sexual encounters never discussed STDs or AIDS. And email apparently played a major role in how far intimacy went so quick. From the abstract: "The high frequency and intensity of email communication prior to meeting in person cultivated acceleration of intimacy for the individuals involved and may have affected somen's decisions to engage in risky sexual behaviours." The study used a survey placed on various online dating services and targetting women. The survey was completed by 740 women of which 568 said they had met someone in person. While 30% had sex on the first date, some were specifically looking for that.MORE

25THINGS WOMEN WANT TO HEAR

1. Gee, Sweetheart, let's skip dinner tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is you. 2. Wow, I just don't know what to do with this money we won in the lottery, so why don't you take it to the mall and see if you can find something to buy with it. 3. Hey, how about inviting your mother to spend the summer with us. 4. Oh, go ahead and eat that third piece of chocolate cream pie. If it's one thing I hate it's skinny women. 5. What luck, they had a special rental rate at the video store on romance movies. 6. How about I give you a nice massage and foot rub. I really don't like sex that much anyway. (Huh?? - ^v^) 7. You know, that Pam Anderson just doesn't seem to have the brain power that I find so attractive in a woman. 8. What a break, I won a prize on the radio station.... tickets to either the Super Bowl or the opening of the New York Ballet. I got first choice so pack your bags for New York, we get to go to the ballet!!! 9. Be careful Darling...don't let it go too far down your throat. 10. Who wants to play golf when I can get to see how good the lawn looks when it's freshly mowed. 11. While you're up Sweetheart, can you get me a glass of water. I think I've had enough beer. 12. Shoot, there's nothing on TV but football games. Let's go furniture shopping. 13. There ought to be a law against those porno movies. Can you believe that there are guys that would actually want their wives to do those things they show? 14. Man I tell you, nothing feels better than getting all spruced up in a suit and tie. 15. I'm getting a little tired of steak on the grill. How about a nice quiche? 16. You know, I think I'd really prefer the four-door sedan to that impractical Corvette. 17. Look at that... disgusting. Why would she wear a short skirt like that with no panties? 18. Golly I think we're lost. Let me find a gas station to ask for directions. 19. My golf clubs are only 30 years old. Why don't you use the money my parents gave us to get something nice for the house. 20. If the guys call and want me to go to that new strip club with them, tell them I'm busy. I really want to get the living room painted tonight. 21. You know Sweetheart, I'm really glad you don't like doing all those dirty things they write about in those stupid sex advice columns. 22. Sports cars are just such stupid little toys for men who have never really grown up. 23. If you're looking for me later, I'll be over there looking at the home decorating magazines. 24. You know, we really don't visit your relatives enough. 25. Why don't you relax this weekend. I'll take care of the cooking and housework.

SUCCESS STORIES

"Everything happens when you least expect it, but IT HAPPENS!!!! However, without MATCHGIRLS the chances of it happening would be greatly reduced! The story starts in the summer of 2002 when a friend of mine told me about your site and asked me if I wanted to make a profile there, to chat with people. I said sure, why not? So I made a profile DAVID, attached two photos of myself and started looking at other profiles. And there are so many!!!!! People from all over the world, from almost all the countries have profiles there in a hope to meet other people, to get married, to have a pen-pal in another country or simply to chat. It was amazing! Soon after I started receiving interests and mails from all over the world. Since communication is one of mine favorite hobbies, I was in the right place. It was absolutely great to talk to people from far away countries, with different cultural and social educations! It is something that DOES NOT HAPPEN too often!!!! It doesn’t matter how much you try, it just doesn’t happen. It was in the beginning of November when I received the interest of SANIA25 from Greece/ Salonica. I replied to his interest and I received in return a mail. Soon after we started writing to each other on our personal e-mail addresses. I was in Romania, in Bucharest and he was in Greece, and we were talking about our countries, about our lifestyles, places we visited, etc. Nothing too personal, only general emails, no phone conversations. And this went on until January 2003. When I got back in January I wrote to him again, mentioning that I was also supposed to go on a business trip to Bulgaria/ Sofia for a week. To my surprise, he told me he could arrange to come to Bulgaria for us to meet. I was excited!! Finally, on 1st of February 2003 we met in Sofia, halfway distance from Bucharest/ Romania to Salonica/ Greece! We spent a weekend there (actually half of it, because Stelios finished work late and arrived late!) and it was great! We finally talked about everything, relationships, work, just about everything! I discovered that he likes talking even more than me, that he is kind, full of humor, generous, reliable and most of all, honest! That weekend was one of the best in my life! (Only because the best ones would come later!!) We went back to our countries and because Valentine’s Day was coming, Stelios told me that he would be visiting me in Romania! Nobody can imagine my excitement!!!!!! We were talking on the phone everyday four hours, we were sending e-mails to each other, sms. I must admit that period of time was one of the most expensive in our lives! After his first visit to Romania we started meeting every weekend. It was either Bucharest or Salonica. Finally, after about 1 and a half months since we met the first time, on the way to the airport in Salonica, he asked me if I would consider moving in with him in Macedonia, where he had been relocated with work. Without hesitation I said Yes! And so, after 4 months since we met, on 1st of June 2003, I moved to Macedonia. Until now we both believe that was the best thing we could do to be with each other. That summer we also got engaged. We stayed in Macedonia for about 9 months, until we decided to move to Greece, which we did in the spring of 2004. 29th of July 2004 we got married. Presently we are living in Greece, we made a house, we raised a dog and we love each other like never before. And if I look back now to the moment I made my profile on MATCHGIRLS FORUM, I must say: I changed my life forever!!!! I found the most wonderful man in the world (actually he found me) and since then, together, hand in hand, with the smile on our faces and with an intense love in our hearts, we are walking the ways of life wherever they may lead. And there is nothing greater than this!!!! PS: For those of you who are still suspicious, have hesitations or simply are not ready to make an important step, I have only two words to say: DO IT!!! Make a profile and look for your other half! It might be the best decision you have ever made in your life!"

BUYING GIFTS FOR THE LADY YOU LOVE

Despite what they may say, almost every woman enjoys receiving a gift from her partner or date. Giving the woman you love a romantic gift is a gesture that shows that you have been thinking of her. But you should put some careful thought into what sort of gifts you buy and when you buy them. Buying a gift every time you go out will simply diminish the surprise element of your gesture, and buying an inappropriate gift will make your good intentions appear thoughtless.

If you want to buy a gift within the first few dates you should keep it really simple. Flowers are probably your best bet. You won’t really know enough about your partner to buy anything else – even chocolates can be tricky until you have found out more about her. She may be allergic to chocolate, she may only like dark chocolate or soft centres, or she may be dieting…until you know these things about her, even something as apparently simple as a box of chocolates can be the wrong gift to buy.

Larger items like jewellery are a definite no until you have got to know her properly. Buying gifts like this early on in a relationship – even if you do know what sort of jewellery she likes – may put her off and make her think that you are getting too serious, too quick. In time, you can start buying items like this but only when you are sure that the relationship is going somewhere and that she will not feel overwhelmed by your expensive gift.

Trips and short breaks to romantic destinations are a great way of surprising her – but again, these should be reserved for later in the relationship. If you make a gesture like this early on before you even get to know her properly, you may find yourself stuck in Paris for three days with a woman you don’t even get on with that well! Plus, she may be angry about you assuming that she’ll go away with you by buying the tickets without even consulting her.

The best way to decide on gifts for your loved one is to listen to what she says. You can find out a surprising amount about a person just by their general conversation, and by picking up on seemingly small talk you can really get a feel for her likes and dislikes. But until you have found out more about her and you are sure that she is comfortable with the relationship, hold off buying those larger gifts and stick to small, simple gestures.